Captain Planet Needs Some New Planeteers

So the internet and social media is ablaze with the news that 90s kids cartoon icon Captain Planet is coming back to us on the silver screen. The producers behind Transformers: The Dark of the Moonin partnership with Cartoon Network are tirelessly working on a way to bring the coolest eco-warrior with a mullet back to life. So we here at TQS would like to lend a hand and perhaps cast the Planeteers for them.

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Now for those of you who are asking ‘what is Captain Planet?’ I only suggest you go on YouTube and look for the title sequence, which pretty much sums it up. Captain Planet came to prominence at the beginning of the 90s and was an edutainment cartoon, which had a heavy-handed message of environmentalism. Basically Gaia, voiced by none other than Whoopi Goldberg, is upset that pollution has gotten out of control and decides to gift five international young people with magical rings that allow them to control five elements (five you ask, just wait). So we have Kwame, from Africa, who can control earth, Wheeler, from the USA, who can control fire, Linka, from the Soviet Union (Russia now), who controls Air, Gi, from China, who controls water and finally Ma-Ti, from the Amazon Rainforest, who has the power of heart (apparently that allowed him to communicate with animals, but I don’t remember him ever using his powers) and has a pet monkey called Suchi. Now this cast is both politically correct and wonderfully unintentionally racist (bless the 90s).

So these plucky youngsters travelled the globe, in some sort of solar powered plane, and stopped pollution. They fought against a large cast of villains who where voiced by a lot of famous names. We had the likes of Sly Sludge (voiced by Martin Sheen), Verminous Skumm (voiced by Jeff Goldblum) and Dr Blight (voiced by Meg Ryan) and although they had the these famous names voicing them when they first appeared, they were later voiced by different and dare I say less known voice actors. But when the bad guys got too much for our Planeteers to handle they would combine their powers and summon Captain Planet who would deal with the situation with a smile and leave everyone with some pearls of environmental wisdom.

So, TQS has decided that in the spirit of internet fan speculation we would put forward our choices for who should be the Planeteers. Also in the keeping with my usual articles it will be something to do with superheroes. Our thinking is that the original Planeteers are a bit, well, rubbish (don’t get me started on the heart kids hair cut), so to make them cool and popular we turn to the current cool kids Superheroes (Boy Wizards, Emo Vampires and Big Robots just don’t work as well). We shall keep as true to the format as possible and have an international cast of teenagers (or young people), but here we go:

Earth – Terra

Debuting in DC comic’s New Teen Titans #26 (1982) this innocent looking blonde comes from the fictional Eastern European city of Markovia. Tara Markov can manipulate the earth itself (making pillars of stone come out of the ground, causing earthquakes, etc) and is often seen riding on a boulder. Don’t let her cute appearance fool you as she was a little crazy and helped one of the Teen Titans greatest enemies in a storyline called ‘The Judas Contract’. She is a dark and disturbed character who could turn on the rest of the Planeteers at any point (Think of the story potential).

Terra_of_the_Teen_Titans

Fire – The Human Torch

A member of Marvel’s first family and appearing all the way back in 1961, Johnny Storm was the obvious choice. He shares many traits with Planeteer Wheeler, they are both hot heads, ladies men (well I think Wheeler is a ladies man) and are both from America. Johnny is clearly the coolest kid on the block and if the producers can do their magic we may even see Chris Evans back in the role (I’m dreaming here obviously).

humantorch

Wind – Wind Dancer

Sofia Mantega comes from Caracas, Venezuela and was first introduced in New Mutants volume 2 #1 (2003). She can manipulate the wind, allowing her to blow her opponents over and fly. She was a prominent member of this Marvel series and she even became the team leader. So she could be the leader of the Planeteers, if she could even keep them in line.

Wind Dancer

Water – Aqualad

Jackson Hyde only appeared last year in DC’s Brightest Day mini series, but he is perfect for the role as the water Planeteer. He can manipulate water, breathe underwater and can swim really fast. Not only that but he can fill a space within the Planeteers that the producers of a Transformers film would love, the token black guy. I suppose he isn’t too international as he is also from the USA, but I believe he is what the producers are looking for.

jackson hyde

Heart – Kitty Pryde

Heart is the worst one to cast as it is, let’s be honest, a stupid power. It made no sense then and it makes no sense now, but I chose someone who could maybe fit the role. Kitty first appeared in Uncanny X-Men #129 (1980) and she could be considered the heart (see what I did there) of the X-Men of that era. Her youthful enthusiasm and determination made her one of the best X-Men characters and lets face it a girl who can walk through walls, trained by Wolverine and has a pet dragon is better than a wimpy kid from South America with his angry monkey.

Kitty_Pryde_by_Paul_Smith

So there are our Superhero picks for the new Planeteers and to be honest we don’t think these guys would ever need to combined their powers and summon Captain Planet as they are quite capable on their own. All joking aside we are excited/anxious to see what a 21st century Captain Planet would be like. Who knows, it could be good.

Who would you pick? Let us know below

Dan Cole

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